The activity began to garner attention from other kids, and several began working together, sharing the blocks, adding to one another’s work, complimenting each other on what they had achieved, helping one another as the tower grew, and giggling and laughing excitedly.

Once the tower was taller than me, we created a mini math lesson by

counting how many rows it took to make the tower. The students persevered even though it took a fair amount of time and coordination. All of this playtime demonstrated the building blocks of becoming a good citizen:

That same afternoon, I spent Meadow Time with fourth and fifth graders in the Gaga pit. Gaga is a popular game similar to dodgeball. It’s played in a fenced-in circle with a rubber ball. You can start the game with any number of people–whoever wants to play! The object is to avoid getting hit by the ball from the waist down. You can deflect the ball with your hands or arms only once, aiming for others or bouncing it off the wall. 

To be honest, I was the first person out in round one. I wasn’t adept at scurrying around, watching carefully, etc. But there was also a contingency that had the goal of getting me out. Then, in round two, a whole collection of girls took on the goal of protecting me and keeping me from getting out. It really was fun playing, and as I reflect, I realize all the benefits that came from it. I saw groups of children developing teamwork, communicating with each other, and thinking through strategies to stay in the game. There was a healthy dose of competitiveness aligned with the need for integrity when someone was tagged out. There was also patience as those of us who were tagged waited for the round to be over and the chance to play again.

Another afternoon, I was with a group of girls who were performing all kinds of gymnastics moves. It started as a small group and then grew to many. I witnessed girls trying things they had never done before and a healthy dose of risk-taking. They helped each other, readily accepted help when they couldn’t do something on their own, and communicated and collaborated to accomplish something together. During attempt after attempt, the girls had fun trying to improve without competing.

My play sessions with the kiddos were pretty typical examples of how High Meadows values childhood as a distinct stage of life marked by a compelling drive to play, learn, and persevere. In his book Free to Learn, Peter Gray says, “Children must feel safe and cared for in order to devote themselves fully to exploring and learning, and children learn best from those with whom they have caring, trusting relationships.” HMS teachers care about what kids know, who kids are, and what makes them feel safe, happy, and ready to thrive. It’s the relationships we develop within the community that contribute to the development of well-rounded individuals. “No human being survives without being able to connect with other people,” says Gray.

We provide children ample free play where they learn to make friends, overcome their fears, see from others’ perspectives, negotiate differences, solve their own problems, and generally take control of their own lives. As they play, children practice and acquire the physical and intellectual skills that are essential for success in the culture in which they are growing. As Gray puts it, "Play is nature's way of ensuring that we practice the skills needed for adulthood." The predominant emotions of play are interest and joy. In play, away from adults, children really do have control and can practice asserting it. Free play is also a means of helping children discover what they love. They discover their talents.